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Tasteless Jokes

There are 108 Tasteless jokes in this category. Prev 5 | Next 5

Barbars Advice (Added On: 2017-12-08 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


During his monthly visit to the corner barbershop, this fellow asked his barber for any suggestions on how to treat his increasing baldness. After a brief pause, the barber leaned over and confided that the best thing he'd come across was, er, female juices."But you're balder than I am," protested the customer."True," admitted the barber, "but you've gotta admit I've got one hell of a moustache!"


Gorilla Removal (Added On: 2017-12-03 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


This guy wakes up one morning to find a gorilla in his tree. He looks in the phone book for a gorilla removal service until he finds one. "Is it a boy or girl Gorilla?" the service guy asks. "Boy," is the man's response. "Oh yeah, I can do it. I'll be right there", says the service guy. An hour later the service guy shows up with a stick, a Chihuahua, a shotgun, and a pair of handcuffs. He then gives the man some instructions: "Now, I'm going to climb this tree and poke the gorilla with the stick until he falls. When he does, the trained Chihuahua will bite the gorilla's testicles off. The gorilla will then cross his hands to protect himself and allow you to put the handcuffs on him." The man asks, "What do I do with the shotgun?" The service guy replies, "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the Chihuahua."


The Drunk in the Fountain (Added On: 2017-12-03 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


A drunk is standing, pissing into a fountain in the middle of town, so a cop comes up to him and says "Stop that and put it away!" The drunk shoves his dick into his pants and does up his zip. As the cop turns to go, the drunk starts laughing."Okay, what's so funny?"asks the cop."Fooled you."says the drunk "I put it away, but I didn't stop."


Witness to an Accident (Added On: 2017-11-28 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The following exchange took place between the lawyer and the witness: The lawyer: "Did you actually see the accident?"The witness: "Yes, sir."The lawyer: "How far away were you when the accident happened?"The witness: "Thirty-one feet, six and one quarter inches."The lawyer (thinking he'd trap the witness): "Well, sir, will you tell the jury how you knew it was exactly that distance?"The witness: "Because when the accident happened I took out a tape and measured it. I knew some stupid lawyer would ask me that question."


Deadly Vices (Added On: 2017-11-19 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


Three desperately ill men met with their doctor one day to discuss their options. One was an alcoholic, one was a chain smoker, and one was a homosexual. The doctor, addressing all three of them, said, "If any of you indulge in your vices one more time, you will surely die."The men left the doctor's office, each convinced that he would never again indulge himself in his vice. While walking toward the subway for their return trip to the suburbs, they passed a bar. The alcoholic, hearing the loud music and seeing the lights, could not stop himself. His buddies accompanied him into the bar, where he had a shot of whiskey. No sooner had he replaced the shot glass on the bar, he fell off his stool, stone cold dead. His companions, somewhat shaken, left the bar, realising how seriously they must take the doctor's words. As they walked along, they came upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground, still burning. The homosexual looked at the chain smoker and said, "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead."


There are 108 Tasteless jokes in this category. Prev 5 | Next 5

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